“You’re Almost There”: When Jewelry Becomes Ostentatious
Well, let me tell you a story.
A group of us were sitting around a table when the conversation turned to hats in church—specifically, what someone jokingly called “Pentecostal fruit-basket hats.”
I told them about a pastor I worked with about fifteen years ago. He invited me to visit his church, and I replied, “I can’t do the hats.”
One of my friends—a man, as it happened—looked at me and said:
“Oh, come on. I’ve seen some of the necklaces you wear. You’re almost there.”
Ouch.
It was funny because it was true enough to sting. I may not have been ready for a large, elaborately decorated church hat, but I have never been shy about wearing a statement necklace.
The exchange reminded me that modesty is not merely about how much skin an outfit reveals. Scripture also connects modesty with restraint in personal display:
“Women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire.”
—1 Timothy 2:9 (ESV)
Paul is not giving us a hedge law that forbids every braid, pearl, or piece of gold. His concern is ostentatious adornment—using our appearance to advertise wealth, status, or importance rather than reflecting godliness and good works.
And that means costume jewelry is not automatically exempt. Something does not have to be expensive to be excessive. A twenty-dollar necklace can command more attention than a costly but understated one. Modesty is not determined by the price tag; it also involves the impression we are trying to create.
Jewelry can be beautiful, feminine, colorful, and enjoyable. I do not believe Scripture requires Christian women to make themselves plain or unattractive. But there is a difference between wearing something lovely and arranging ourselves so that everyone must notice us.
That difference is not always measurable. Scripture does not limit us to one necklace, two bracelets, or earrings below a certain size. Here again, we must resist turning wisdom into a dress code. What looks excessive in one setting may look perfectly appropriate in another.
The better questions concern the heart:
Why did I choose this?
Am I enjoying beauty, or seeking attention?
Does my appearance complement the occasion, or dominate it?
Would I be disappointed if no one noticed or complimented what I wore?
My friend’s comment did not make me give up statement necklaces. It did, however, give me a memorable reason to examine them—and myself—a little more honestly.
Perhaps I am not ready for the fruit-basket hat.
But apparently, I’m almost there.
